Acts 9:3-9
Now as he was going along and approaching Damascus, suddenly
a light from heaven flashed around him. He fell to the ground and heard a voice
saying to him, “Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?” He asked, “Who are you,
Lord?” The reply came, “I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting. But get up and
enter the city, and you will be told what you are to do.” The men who were
traveling with him stood speechless because they heard the voice but saw no
one. Saul got up from the ground, and though his eyes were open, he could see
nothing; so they led him by the hand and brought him into Damascus. For three
days he was without sight, and neither ate nor drank.
Henry David Thoreau is often credited with writing “Most men
(people) lead lives of quiet desperation and die with their song still inside
them”
As I sat down earlier this year and wrestled with this year’s
theme: FALLING IN LOVE WITH JESUS --- I tried to imagine what some of the
barriers were to achieving it.
I pondered this long and hard, and I came to the conclusion
that the biggest barrier is myself --- and that may be true for you as well.
My inability to be honest with myself --- let alone with you
--- is always a huge barrier to me building a deeper relationship with Jesus
and of course with each other
In 2014, I had the opportunity to attend Don Miller's
storyline conference --- the fact that it was in San Diego -- in February ---
just made it all that more attractive.
The premise of the conference was to help us live out our
story (or using Thoreau's words) our song that is inside us.
In order to live a great story, we have to change the way
that we approach life.
To live a great story, we need to know who we are, what we
want and understand the conflict that we will need to engage so that we can
take action.
Miller argued that living a great story is like learning to
ride a bike.
It takes patience
and practice
To be able to live a great story we have to change the way
we think about life
·
We need to identify our dreams
·
understand the potential conflicts to achieving
those dreams
·
and create a plan of action
Once we begin this journey we can begin to embrace what is
at stake --- the song that is trapped inside you.
Too many people struggle to find the meaning and purpose of
life.
Don Miller said: "What if life is not meaningless ---
but your life is meaningless?"
Don't you want
to unlock the meaning and live it out?
It was Maya Angelou who said: "There is no greater
agony than bearing an untold story inside you."
The question is how do we free that story and live the life
we were meant to live.
I am NOT a Calvinist --- I do not believe that God has foreordained
our lives.
I believe that God walks with us
--- not grabs us by the hand and pulls us along.
In other words --- quit looking for the perfect story.
I am not sure
there is such a thing as a perfect story, anyway
But
I am convinced that there are millions of good ones
Jon Acuff says that to have a meaningful story it requires
two things
Heart and structure
And he offers five ways to start living your best life
1. Don't wait for
a perfect vision of what your story is to be
You
just have to start
2. Yes, you will
be afraid
When asked in a Forbes interview what keeps people from
achieving their potential he said the most common trap was fear.
He said:
I've never met a 20 year old or a
50 year old who says, "I've never had a single passion, dream, hope or
desire." We all have them, but a lot of us give in to fear as soon as we
get close to them. The reason is that fear only gets loud when you do things
that matter. Fear never bothers you if you're average but the second you dare
to be more than ordinary, fear awakens.
Fear is not the same as regret
Better to
face your fear today instead of living your regret forever
3. People will
criticize you
4. Be patient
5. You have to
say YES
So how do we write our story?
Our story ---
not the story that the world tries to give us!
It starts with you getting out a piece of paper
I did this the other day, and after I finished, the next day
I found the list I made while at the conference --- what amazed me was two
things
·
Almost everything was the same
·
What changed --- on this new list I was more
honest with myself
I
was more willing to admit my failure (and how those failures turned into
something positive!)
And I think that is the key --- HONESTY
So the first thing to do is to write down all the important positive
events in your life
The ones that
have left a legacy --- been a turning point or marker
After making that list --- go back and add to it, the
negative turns.
This is where
it gets hard to be honest with ourselves
But the goal is to begin to see
the redemption that is found even in those hard places
Much like
Paul’s story this morning.
I am going to trust you enough, and share some of my journey
(some things I have NEVER shared before) --- I do this fully understanding the
risks involved --- but I am convinced --- that if Meridian Street wants to
reach it's potential in leading people into discipleship with Jesus ---THE ONLY
WAY that is going to happen is if we can be dangerously honest with each other.
I know that this could explode
But I embrace
Jon Acuff's third principle
PEOPLE
WILL CRITICIZE YOU
This is a sampling of my combined list --- just some of the
highlights
When I look back on my life --- the first seminal moment
took place when I was about 9 years old.
I was in the elementary school production of The Wizard of
Oz, I was so good, I was (along with the rest of my class who didn't get
selected for a part) invited to be in the chorus.
During the dress rehearsal --- Mrs.
Boone (who was not only a member of the church, but our families were very
close) --- Mrs. Boone walked over to me and suggested I turn and face the back
of the stage and not sing so loudly.
I
was devastated
Obviously, I still hang on to it 50
years later, that is my first real significant memory
And it took a long time for that
story to redeem itself --- but it actually did (that’s another story for
another day)
A year or so later I found myself in the hospital in
Jackson, TN sharing the room with a boy who was sick like me. It was my first encounter with someone of a
different race and I learned a powerful lesson.
While his skin might have been
darker than mine --- and the end of the day --- we were both equally
scared. God gave me a gift, a glimpse of
what brothers and sisters are really like
When I went to High School, I joined the debate team (I
certainly wasn't joining the choir) and I found great success.
Not only were
we good --- I was respected (I am not sure I felt that before)
It gave me a confidence that I had never had
When I went off to college, I chose the school I chose not
because of the school, but I wanted to go someplace that all my friends were
not.
It may have been one of the wisest
decisions in my life.
When I came home at Christmas my Freshman year I shared to
family and friends that I felt God calling me into the ministry
Nobody
was surprised --- which was a huge disappointment
And a comment
was given to me that has stuck
"You
will be good because you get along with people"
It has taken me a long time to
unpack the influence (good and bad) that that little statement has had on my life
My last year in college I became a Resident Assistant and
while in that role met another Resident Assistant we dated our senior year and
I headed off to Duke Divinity School
We were separated during that year, but we decided to get
married so we could be together.
A few months before the wedding, my best friend and I had
one of those talks --- he knew --- and I knew --- that getting married was a
mistake --- but I kept feeling that I would disappoint people if I broke it
off.
Because my story was that I got
along with people and should be able to work it out (Right?)
I didn't break it off and we were
married that summer.
It lasted a semester --- the reasons
why it didn’t work are irrelevant
Both of us were to blame
The next big transformational event in my life was meeting a
young woman named Nancy Hollowell
She has been amazing
She was with me when Stewart died
--- and I am not sure that I could have made it thought that period without her
And that event --- probably more than any other on this list
has been profound on my life’s story.
I would not --- I could not --- be
a pastor without having gone through that terrible tragedy
I do not believe Stewart died so
that I could be a pastor, but through the pain and agony --- Stewart taught and
shaped me
Shortly after that Nancy and I got married
Best thing I
have ever done!
Each of the girls births have been transformational
When I was 29 years old, having only served a small county
seat church, I was invited to become the founding pastor of a church in Warsaw
Indiana.
That was the most stress filled and exhilarating time of my
life
two of the
girls were born during this period
But after 6 years, I was out of balance and I knew I had to
leave
Jump ahead almost 20 years (not that there are not important
things in-between)
But about 12 years in as pastor in Munster, for reasons I
have not fully comprehended even to this day a family that we were very close
too fell away --- not from the church mind you --- just from our lives.
While they had been some of our
biggest supporters, and as family we did many things with ----Now they were
distant, and behind the scenes not always honest
I still sting from that experience
One of the challenges of staying a long time as the pastor
of a church is you have to re-invent yourself.
I managed to go through three such transitions while I was at Munster,
but as I faced the reality of a fourth transition, I (to be honest) could not
figure out which way to turn.
I was still hurt by the broken relationship and was tired of
always trying to keep everyone playing nice together.
So I decided to jump ship.
My mistake was I jumped at the
first thing that came along.
I went to work for a non-profit and quickly found myself
dealing with some questionable practices.
I remember coming home when I was looking to hire an
assistant and I told Nancy that I had two excellent candidates, but I could not
hire one because she was too pretty and I perceived that some in management had
a tendency to prey on pretty women. But
there was nothing I could do to change that.
After six months, I was fired ---
mainly because I asked too many questions, and I learned a surprising
lesson. When someone wants you gone bad
enough they will pay you to leave (if you get my drift).
The day before I was fired, was the day I got a phone call
from Bert Kite asking me if I would be interested in coming to Meridian
Street. A month earlier, I had made the
decision that I needed to be back in the church.
Why is all this important?
Because knowing where I have been --- helps me examine my future
dreams and help make sure that they are aligned and that I have the strength to
deal with the inevitable conflicts that will come.
A few years ago, a hospice nurse put together a list of the
regrets that she had heard shared by those who are dying. (Bronnie Ware)
1. I
wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others
expected of me.
2. I
wish I hadn't worked so hard.
3. I
wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.
4. I
wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5. I
wish that I had let myself be happier.
In response to those, Don Miller created what he called the 5
Commandments of the Living
1. Don't
ignore your dreams
2. Keep
work and relationships in balance
3. Project
your God-given self into the world
4. Cultivate
deep friendships
5. Be
grateful
Pretty good list, and as I enter begin to dream about the next
stage of my life, they are certainly things I need to be more cognizant of
Your story matters
Take action --- to make YOUR story count
Not everyone will want you to change
The stakes are high
By living fully the story God
intends you impact other people --- and model for them what living their own
story can be like
And I am convinced ---
You cannot fully fall in love with
Jesus unless you are honest about your story and let it be known --- to YOU and
GOD.
My favorite thing that Don Miller said --- If you don’t like
your story --- write a new one!
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